Modern Love

Modern Love

by Yolayra Baldeo

You would think us teenagers know nothing about the kind of love that existed 30-40 years ago: exchanging love poems, standing outside of houses singing, bringing flowers to every date. Well, things are so much different now. This generation’s idea of love seems so limited. I feel that this generation fears commitment which is really disappointing for people who really do want to love and support their partner. Everyone wants the affection, yet they seem to want it from multiple people at the same time. Or they want to be free; they don’t want to be tied down to just one person not realizing that the other person with true feelings can get hurt by these little games. It is actually really hard during this time to find real love without the toxicity: “friends with benefits”, talking stages, and cheating.

Depending on how serious the relationship is, the talking stage can be either long or short. As teenagers, we go through so many talking stages, normally 2-3 months getting to know a person. If the feelings are mutual, you either start dating or keep “talking” which basically means getting to know each other. The talking stage is where you try to understand the person you can see yourself being with . However, it is called a “stage” for a reason. It doesn’t last typically because the guy or even the girl gets bored quickly and wants to move on. In most scenarios, one person ends up getting hurt. This is because in this stage it is oftentimes unclear what people want out of the relationship. There is no official title of “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” which allows people to pursue others without the expected guilt. For instance, if a guy or girl were to cheat or be “unfaithful” during the talking stage, it wouldn’t count because they are not really dating . Therefore, no one in the relationship can even be upset about anything. You would think after talking to someone and opening up, they would be loyal . However people like to just “talk” since they also want the freedom to date others. It all comes down to the fact that if you don’t want the relationship to be anything serious or exclusive  the talking stage is what happens.

For my generation, love seems so temporary. Everything is about appearances and physical connection instead of being about the emotional connection. Everything is so rushed. Social media plays a big role in this as well. By seeing all these famous couples together on social media, we want to rush a relationship along and have someone there for us. Yet, we fail to understand that if it’s meant to be, it will happen. We let so many people into our lives not realizing it can have a negative impact on us, and we end up getting hurt. We must learn that it’s okay to not be ready for love, and if we aren’t ready we love, then we shouldn’t confuse or hurt those who are. Ultimately, it’s very simple: be considerate of other’s feelings.

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